2009-08-June Monday

I am going to add this last entry to Ed's blog. As most of the family and friends know now, at 1:15PM on June 8,2009, Ed passed away in my arms in our home,with our grand daughters Andrea and BreAnne, his oldest son Christopher, along with a wonderful Hospice nurse at his side.I have spent 25 great years with this man and letting go was the hardest thing I will probably do in my life. At 5am this morning he told me he loved me and even tried to play "Patty Fingers" with me.He was given a bath and shaved at 10am by a very caring Hospice nurse. He was then resting comfortably and we knew in our hearts he was ready to pass.He was my husband,my friend,my lover,my playmate and we had some of the best times in our lives together as well as some of the worst times,and I am going to miss him dearly. I want to Thank the good Lord above for sharing him with me on this earth, Since we knew of his impending death Ed and I talked about so many things including, how he would "Wait Just Beyond The Moon" and I would join him there when the time was right. I love him and will miss him with all my heart.................

2009-06-08-Monday

We had to call Hospice last night,he became very combative and upset.He was soiled and we changed his sheets and cleaned him up and he slept most of the rest of the night in a peaceful state.We will be having an Aide in daily now to help with this process. He is not in any pain,but he does know what is going on around him.He can hear everything.If we are in the room and talking he smiles at us,if he is uncomfortable he is fitful.His vocabulary is now only at a few words, but you can understand most of them.Our grand daughters, Andrea and BreAnne, and I are rotating shifts so we may give him 24 hour attentive care.

2006-06-06-Saturday

This morning he had a very hard time getting out of the bed. Each time he tried he would fall back and go back to sleep.His meds are keeping him dozy but this stage of the disease is also causing him to sleep.Pat talked to him about Hospice bringing a bed out for him.He finally agreed,so as of today he will be bed ridden.Our only problem is he still can become lucid for short periods and it upsets him alot to not be able to get out of the bed for bathroom duties.He hadn't had any food intake now in 4 days.When we tried to cook in the house for ourselves he got very sick at his stomach and now everyone here is on grazing foods.He has pretty much lost his voice and is waving his hands and looking into the future.They call this the transition period.

2009-06-06-Saturday

I know it has been a week since I added anything to this blog but so many changes have taken place and since Ed's children were planning a trip here to visit and the house has been so full of people it has been hard for me to sit and update.
His condition is now a waiting game.Since we can not draw blood we have no idea what his counts are we just know if we see any color in his skin its good... As long as he keeps his feet up we can control the swelling and purple tints to his toes.
In the last few days he has tried to eat he has we have gotten very sick at his stomach,and thrown up everything he puts on his stomach and only wants icy cold drinks.
Tuesday night he wanted to sleep in his own bed and did a good job of sleeping but he is getting very restless.He can no longer swallow,and was given liquid morphine .05ml very 4 to 6 hours,but that has since gone up to .10ml very 4 hours. About 10:30 he ask for the hospice nurse to come out because he was so upset and scared about something.We never really figured out what it was but they added a medication of HALOPERIDOL [for nausa and aggravation.We give this to him especially at night and if the house has too many people and activity.
Early Wednesday morning again we called the hospice nurse as his breathing was labored and he was very restless and aggravated and at one point was talking in his sleep.She said his blood pressure was up so it meant he was in pain.His children arrived for a visit but he is now sleeping most of the time.We have no idea how much he weighs,but the bones in his back and shoulder are protruding and his spine bones can be counted.
Wednesday night he tried to get up in the middle of the night and before I could get the light on and around the bed he had fallen into the bedroom door.
His children left Thursday morning after their visit.
Friday night Pat and Linda came for a visit.

2009-05 -31-Sunday

OK a fun note....We wake up to the "hillbilies" in our yard and I am so happy to see them and happy to have another room just in case we need it...Shane and Andrea are finally here.Marie arrives and now the house is really full.

But a sad note is Amiee,Joe and Colton have to go home...

2009-05-30-Saturday

Had a couple of rough spots saturday,Michele was here and he was feeling some pain and having some labored breathing.She listened to his chest and heard some lung sounds so she felt we should call and tell the hospice nurse.She came out and said he did have an elevated heart rate and that he had a low grade fever.But he is still fighting,Going to the porch,smoking and having coffee with Michele and Smokey....And Butch, Bre and the boys came out for a little quality time.

2009-05-29-Friday

Had a bad day and had to call Hospice.His blood pressure was 100/60 and has been for 2 days now.He started out taking pain pills 1 every 6 hours but today we found he needed 2 every 4 hours,so the hospice nurse came out and he is now wearing a Fentanyl patch.He can still take a pain pill as a buffer.The patch started working almost immediately and did not need a buffer for 13 hours.He is having a hard time swallowing so they have put him on "Thick-it"to make water a little thick so it more or less slides down the throat.Breanne,her boys [Jaden,Bryent and Lane],Butch and Threse arrived.