Friday, May 1, 2009


This is going to be the hardest AND most difficult note me to write,but I am respecting Ed's wishes and doing it.

After Dr.Qadri leaves the room Ed starts talking to me about going to San Antonio,more Dr's,more tests and whatever...He said he DID NOT want to be a guinea pig unless there was a chance we would see some improvement and he wants to know more about the Dr's there. And he was hungry.So I go down the hall and see his primary Dr.and ask him to please talk to Ed before we leave the hospital.he came by and I don't know everything they talked about but I do know He told us Ed was being kept alive right now with these transfusions.And his chances in San Antonio were probably only about 10% we could find improvement before his passing.They talked awhile and Ed said all he wanted was to go home and sit on the porch and smoke cigarettes until his demise.Ed ask if he did that long did they think he would have.Of course as long as he is on Chemo [which doesn't seem to be working] and transfusions that's a question He could not answer,but he could tell him things WILL NOT GET BETTER.He will keep losing weight,the transfusions will be coming closer together and he will become weaker. Ed even ask if he would have any pain and the Dr said he would have very little.Ed ask how long he would have after he stopped his meds and transfusions, and he said he did not know but at some point within a couple of weeks his heart would stop beating. Another thing that could happen would be a vessel in his brain would burst and he would go instantly or, the worst, his spleen would get a bleed and within a matter he would internally bleed to death with minutes.
When he left Ed said lets go home and we will talk.
He didn't say much on the way home.And when we got here we talked for a long time.
He has made the decision he will keep up with the Chemo and when needed the transfusions and Platelets.He wants to get all his papers in order and make a will.He has decided that when he becomes so tired and weak he will cease ALL forms of treatment,and sit on his porch,smoke cigarettes and "die with dignity".
And he said that anyone who wants to visit or call had better do it within the next couple of months.
He saw this blog and he is the one who approved it.
I will not divulge my thoughts on this or make any comments, as I have lived with this man for 25 years and I love and respect him.And I intend to do as he wishes.All I can ask is that everyone do the same.

No comments:

Post a Comment